Sunshine Cleaning - 6.5/10 FRUS

We recommend the pecan pie. Stay away from the cantaloupe.

Today is March 17 and Peach had a temper tantrum. Although Peach comes from Irish stock, leprechauns definitely stole her gold tonight. It was a struggle all around. We saw Sunshine Cleaning post-incident. A classic tale of a hard working single mother's struggle to keep a job, support her young son and her younger sister as well as juggle an emotionally trying relationship and sexual affair with her high school boyfriend turned married man, we award Sunshine Cleaning 6.5 FRUs.

It must be noted that there were many inconsistencies with this particular moviegoing experience.

1) Flo was lame and forgot the MWC at home.

2) We opted out of the famous super screen #2 combo. Fret not, vats were had, albeit mini medium vats, however we chose to opt out of the 636 calorie popcorn snack. Why, you ask? Read on.

3) We chose to visit the diner that we often frequent. In hindsight, there were clear clues foreshadowing a disastrous dinner experience. We should have been alarmed when there were no normal booths left. There was a bo booth that was long and strong on one side but teeny on the opposite side. So teeny that one with a considerable bottom would feel quite compromised. We resigned to a two-seater booth. Although we were only two, the table was a bit high. Or the seats were too low. Or we were too short. Or the table was too high. However you choose to view it, it was awkward. We ordered what we came for (eggs of course). Initially, Flo was upset because of the small portion of french fries. Although Peach rationalized that Flo would not have been able to consume a larger portion, Flo was upset nonetheless about the serving size.
Moving along, Flo's bacon tasted like Hanukkah. She liked that, but Peach did not taste the same holiday. For her, the bacon tasted more like Yom Kippur. Why such a mournful holiday? Because what was about to happen forced her to mourn, feel cheated, and later repent for her inappropriate actions.

Having not been able to substitute fruit for french fries, Peach began to pine over a fresh cantaloupe half. Looking at the melon, then into Flo's eyes, and back at the melon, the two of us telepathically agreed to split a melon half. Flo suggested they try it with cottage cheese. Within minutes, the two were scooping cottage cheese with succulent melon and all was well in the world. Or so it seemed. The eggs were wonderful and the fruit cheese concoction was a hit.
And then came the check just as Flo's phone rang.

The check read:
Poached eggs: 525
Over easy eggs: 675
Half cantaloup: 795


Yes, you read correctly. There is no typo here. 795 for half a melon! Not only did Peach feel cheated, violated and used (those are her words), she felt it her duty to make it known to the restaurant staff and all patrons. What a scandal! How could they possibly charge so much for half a fricken melon???? Beyond consoling, Peach proceeded to throw a fit. All this while Flo was on the phone.

Have you ever taken a call when it's difficult to hear the person on the other end? Subconsciously, you speak up hoping that your friend will take the hint and speak louder herself? Well, Flo was screaming in the diner. First she spoke with an 8 year old, next a 3 year old, an infant and finally, her 86 year old cousin. The whole restaurant watched as Flo yelled the same sentence five times while Peach accosted the manager for robbing her of an hour's salary. Ridiculous? Yes. Did we cause a scene? Most definitely. Will we return? Absolutely.

After the diner, we proceeded to a grocery store to stock up on sugar items. While walking to the appropriate aisle, we passed the produce section. Even in this extremely overpriced New York grocery store, a FULL cantaloupe was just 2.99. Their discovery only increased Peach's anger.

As for the movie, Sunshine Cleaning, it was pretty good. At times a bit slow, but this observation is most likely blown out of proportion as both Flo and Peach were antsy from their sugar intake. Perhaps the most frustrating part was that there was no sex scene between Rose (Amy Adams) and her new found love interest (Clifton Collins Jr.). Not only do you root for them from their first encounter, nothing physical materializes. In general, the humor was actually funny and the audience was receptive. But there was a deeper layer to the movie. Both Rose and her sister Norah (Emily Blunt) are haunted by their tragic past making their chosen profession especially ironic. At times, this sad undercurrent seemed forced, but overall, it added meaning to the movie. In sum, we give Sunshine Cleaners 6.5/10 FRUS. Sandwich recommendation: a hearty veggie burger with Swiss. Probably best to stay away from meat and all things that defecate when watching this movie.

In case you are curious, Clifton has two arms in real life.